The Americans with Disabilities Act does not require it, but good manners do—proper etiquette toward persons with disabilities, both clients and employees.
Mistakes in manners often occur in professional offices. Here are some of the more common blunders to watch for:
1 The handshake
A common error is not offering to shake hands with a client or employee who has a hand deformity.
You should always offer a handshake. In business a handshake is a big deal and people who are disabled do not want to be excluded.
What if the right hand is missing? Offer the left hand.
Imagine the scenario of several people in a room, one of whom has a hand deformity. The managing partner walks in and shakes hands with all but one. Besides embarrassing that person, it is a good way to lose a client.
2 The interpreter
Another blunder comes in communication with deaf persons talking through interpreters.
The natural tendency is to look at the interpreter when talking. Don’t. The person having the conversation is the one who has the hearing problem. That’s the person to be looking at. It’s rude to not look the disabled person in the eye.
Don’t worry about the interpreter not being able to understand what’s being said. It is the interpreter’s job to figure it out.
3 The confrontation
Then there is the blunder of treating the person with a physical disability as if he had a mental disability. Don’t give the disabled person less challenging assignments. Don’t back off from a healthy confrontation when conflict arises. Discipline the disabled employee like any other employee.
If there is a disagreement, say so. Don’t be gentle just because the person has a disability. Doing so makes the individual feel coddled and disrespected.
4 Unsolicited assistance
Giving assistance is another point to watch. Don’t give help without getting permission. However good the intention, unsolicited assistance is condescending.
Consider the example of picking up a box a disabled client is carrying through the office. You should wait for a request for assistance. Or you should ask if the person needs a hand and wait for the response.
On a larger scale, don’t just assume some job is going to be a problem for a staffer and invest in a new system without asking that person if it is necessary. The individual may have a way to do the job without assistance and the extra help may be an embarrassment.
Ask. Say, “I want you to do X. Will that be a problem for you?”
And always ask in private.
Along with that, set an atmosphere of dialogue. Tell the person, “I want you to be comfortable talking with me, so let me know if anything I am asking will be a big deal for you
5 Mincing words
Another blunder is over-sensitivity to common expressions.
It’s okay to say, “Did you see the show last night?” to a blind employee, “Did you hear that song?” to a deaf employee, or “Would you like to take a walk?” to someone in a wheelchair.
Never apologize for standard speech. To do so draws attention the disability and separates that person from the norm.
Some specific disability points
Here are some blunders that happen with specific types of disabilities:
–The blind client or employee. There the mistake is not identifying the speaker. When approaching a blind person, say “Hello, Mary. It’s John. ” Or, “John here. I’d like to discuss this with you.”
Be aware there are different degrees of visual impairment. A person may be considered blind but might actually have some vision.
–The speech impaired client or employee. When what a person says is not understandable, don’t nod and agree. Say, “I didn’t hear what you said. Can you repeat that?” That’s not insulting. It shows respect for what the person has to say.
Another approach is to paraphrase what was said and let the person agree to the interpretation instead of having to go through the difficulty of repeating it all.
–Wheelchair user. Do not push a wheelchair unless the person asks you to.
Don’t lean against the chair, don’t touch it and don’t put your feet on it. In an office people do that when they get comfortable around someone in a wheelchair. They put their hands on the chair and lean against it while talking with that person.
The chair should be considered an extension of the body. It is a personal space. Leaning against it is the same as leaning against the person.
Don’t hover over someone in a chair. Sit down and talk at eye level. Looking down forces the person to stare upwards which, besides being intimidating, is also tiring.
–Deaf employee or client. The big blunder occurs when someone wants to walk between a deaf person and another person who are having a conversation.
Don’t stand there and wait for the conversation to end. Walk on through.
Standing and waiting only brings attention to the disability. Worse, it is confusing to the deaf person. Does it mean it’s time to wrap up the conversation? Or does the third party want to join in the conversation?
As with blindness, there are degrees of hearing impairment. For people with some hearing loss it may be necessary to face them and get their attention before speaking to them. Do not shout; just speak clearly.
–Any disability. Even if the person with the disability jokes about his or her condition, it is not appropriate for you to do so. You might see that as a sign of acceptance and comradeship, but it is more likely to be hurtful.
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